To the asshole with the blue Toyota

[siannan]

Thank you for parking in front of my house, specifically blocking my mailbox so I won't get a delivery today. Thank you for being too fucking cheap to lay out two-fitty for the beach parking lot up the block. Thank you for necessitating my dragging the recycle bin to the other side of my property because if I had put it in my usual place, the goombahs who run the sanitation truck would never have seen it.

I'm going to fill the bird feeders now. I hope they all poop on your simonizing.

Comments

[cpf.livejournal.com]

This sounds like a job for... The Beastmaster!

[ravenfeather.livejournal.com]

razor blades... Finger nail polish remover.. sugar..

[bluesmojo.livejournal.com]

One of my lit professors used to live in Boston, where I guess parking is horrible, and he said one time someone parked in his driveway. He had a friend come by and together they picked the lock on the door, started the car, and pulled it into his garage. That gave them the leverage to charge the guy $100 for the privilege of parking on his property. I'm not sure I believe that story because this person can be full of shit, but I'd like to think it's true.

[auntiesiannan.livejournal.com]

You can't park anywhere in Boston, you can't drive anywhere in Boston, and Massachutsetts has the worst drivers in the fucking nation. So yeah, I would believe his story.